Monday, January 25, 2016

Loneliness in the Midst of a Crowd

Recently, I heard a commentator say that people in general are overloaded with so many impersonal "media friends" and so FEW real relationships as the result of social media.  Loneliness is rampant. 

We get on Facebook and have 500 to 1000 friends, yet when we want to go out on a girls' night we rack our brains trying to find a buddy. 

How many times have you just been SO lonely, wanting to talk to someone, that you have just resigned yourself to Facebook and wasted hours scrolling and "stalking"?

So, why do we Facebook-stalk?

I believe we just want to know something personal about our "friends" because we long to have deeper relationships. 

This is why Hollywood magazines are so popular.  They sell personal information.  These "stars" become our "friends".  We watch their kids grow up, we mourn when they have a loss and we get angry when they sin...but that is no relationship. 

We yearn to have deeper relationships but are going about it in the wrong way. 

You may say, "I  have lots of friends--I have 500 on Facebook."

Let's ask ourselves a few questions--

  • "How many of these Facebook friends have seen you at your worst?"  
  • "How many have you had coffee with?
  • "How many of them can you call and pour out your worst nightmare to?  Yep, that moment that is so raw and embarrassing."
  • "How many would you ask to go shopping with you?"
  • "How many would you trust with your children?"
I would like to encourage you, in 2016, to build some truly deep relationships.  If you are lonely, there are probably more then a handful of ladies around you who are lonely too.

So how do you find a friend?
1. Pray about it. 
Ask the Lord to bring you a friend. Ask God to bring to your attention someone who is lonely too.  Someone to whom you can minister and that can and will minister to you.

2. GO!!!
Go to church events, go to a mom's group, go to the parks, go to library events. Get involved with other women and moms. 

3. Encounter.
  • SMILE!!
  • Make small talk.
  • Let the Lord lead.
  • Ask questions about the other person.
  • Ask for another chance to get together.
It doesn't always work.  You may not always "click" immediately, but be open to whoever God brings into your life. The Lord has brought some incredible women into my life. 

That being said, many of my deepest relationships are with women who are in other states right now.  We met and bonded here but the Lord led them to other states.  We still call, talk with, and pray for each other but, in this season of life, we do it long-distance.  These are the ladies that I call and with whom I have hour-long phone conversations.  They are the ones who have gone through valleys and mountains with me and I with them.  These ladies are my prayer warriors and friends.  I know some very personal things about them and they know personal things about me. 

We were made to love and have relationships.  I know this blog post may sound really elementary, but in this next year, I pray that you will make some forever-friends.  Don't be lonely looking at your screen; make some friends this year. 

- Rejoicing in the Present
Joy T. 

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