Tuesday, November 17, 2015

More on Helping a Widowed Heart

John 15:13 "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends."

FIRST, please watch this video clip of how to help your friend's with their grief. 

Below are some things I take away from the video:

#1.  Let the grieving person tell her story
Invite your friend to tell her story.  It is a way of imprinting the story on someone else.  It's part of the process.  It's part of the healing process. You are carrying their story. 

#2.  It will take AT LEAST a year before healing can fully begin
A grieving person has to go through all the annual events and anniversaries that occur each year, at least one time.  After that, there will not be a first time of doing something without the missing loved one again.   Make sure you are sticking around to be there for these "firsts" with your grieving friends.

How can you tell if your friend is just angry or truly bitter?  Anger is being upset at the situation while bitterness involves your outlook toward the world.

Watch your words...things NOT to say:
- "God needed another angel in heaven."
- "Satan took your baby." 
- "Well, you have three other beautiful children"
-"10 years from now...."  The grieving person is not interested in anyone talking about 10 years from now.
-"You have a baby, so you have a piece of your husband.   It doesn't replace the loss.

Don't fill the silence. Just SIT in silence.

Acknowledge the loss and don't minimize it.

Grieving is good and hopeful because you are fighting through your pain and not just ignoring it.  God is in control.  In Him is no darkness at all.  He is good. We have to hold onto that and the perspective of the hope of Heaven. - Rejoicing in the Present



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